The quote of the day during spin class at the gym this morning was, “Breathe in confidence..Breathe out doubt.” After the instructor shared it, I began breathing in and out, deeply, as I repeated those words over and over with each stroke of the pedals, yearning to pull myself back to that place.
Oh, how I love being in a place of confidence, filled with joy and assurance going throughout my day, overflowing to a place of being able to encourage and help others… but that has not been the place I have been in, and stayed in, for such a long time. It’s been a long, tough year–a long weight loss journey, along with many ups and downs in health dilemmas with my parents, the death of a close friend, along with a huge job transition time for my husband. With so many prayers that may have seemed to go unanswered so far, sometimes I’ve actually had to stop and remind myself to… just breathe.
I’m so tired of letting the waves of doubt come in. As they hit me over and over again, I find myself drowning in fear….and I hate being in a place of fear. So as the spin instructor reminded me to “breathe in confidence….and breathe out doubt” this morning, I had to go right back to that place and pray, once again, for God to show me how.
So, if I have been at that confident, joy filled place before, how did I get there? How do I get back there? How do I breathe that in? The definition of confidence is, “the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust.” So, where do I place my firm trust? Whether it is success in the battle with weight loss, dealing with the health issues or even the death of others, or battling doubt and fear, my confidence has come from holding onto, and trusting God’s promises. Therefore, when my confidence is gone and doubt and fear is overtaking me, I have to grab onto those promises once again and get back to a place of complete trust.
A close friend once shared, “make sure during those great mountain top times in your life, the times when everything is going great…that you are making time to read God’s word and take in His wisdom and promises, because when the valleys come (and they will come, because you can’t have mountains without valleys), you will have what you need to get through.” I’m so thankful that she shared this years ago, because I have placed, and continue to place, those promises in my heart and mind, so that I can breathe them in once again….”Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. (1 Peter 5:7) “I can do All things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13), “So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised. (Hebrews 10;35-36) ” “He works All things together for good, for those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28). He hears, He sees, He counts every tear that falls down your cheeks (Psalm 56:8), He answers, He loves us, He has amazing plans for our lives. This is what I have to breathe in and remember.
When I feel myself drowning, I also shout out an SOS to friends and family who can help. Don’t stay isolated. Reach out and ask for help, shout for help. Staying alone is the worse thing you can do. Others will give you a new perspective, they will do what they can to help, offer support, give you a shoulder to cry on, remind you of the promises you have forgotten, or have not yet heard..and many times God will use someone who has been through the same thing to encourage you and give you hope through their story. Breathing in their testimony with give you hope and renew your faith.
So I breathe in—remembering that He has provided everything I have needed up until this very day, and trust that he will do so, again, tomorrow and the next day….I look back at all of the amazing “God-incidences” (not coincidences) which have happened in my life, and trust that He is working on all of the things I am worried about. I breathe out— letting go of the doubt. Asking him to calm those waves of doubt overtaking me—trading fear for faith. Choosing to trust. Trust….even the word itself, begins and ends with the cross t rus t….”Remember, Wendy, He is ALL that He says He is, and can do ALL that He says He can do. Wipe your tears, let the anxiety go– You can be confident once again… from overwhelmed to overjoyed…….Just breathe.”