I’m Going to Boot Camp….

On September 23, which is only 9 days away from my writing this entry, I am going to be getting on a plane to Nashville, Tennessee, to go to my first boot camp/retreat. The really exciting part is that it is being lead by Carter Hays, Olivia Ward and Hannah Curlee (the sisters who won the Biggest Loser Season 11). If you watched, they were the first team to make it to the finals, and they were known as the “purple team”.

On July 5th, Olivia and Hannah announced this weekend on their myfitspiration blog, and when I saw it, I told my husband that I would love to be able to go to that week. When I said it, I was just dreaming of the possibility. There was a place to tag it on facebook and “like” it, and underneath the tag I wrote, “I would love to go to this”. Well, within minutes there was another post that said….”you are going.” It was from my husband. He bought it for me for my birthday! (which was July 18). I couldn’t believe it! As I was dreaming and contemplating the possibilities, he just did it. (I guess it was meant to be, because it was sold out in 72 hours!…and he made sure I had a spot.

As most of you know, following my story, not only did I watch The Biggest Loser and get inspired by this amazing sister team, but Olivia actually wrote that powerful first email to me that began my whole weight loss journey, “It’s not that you have failed, you just don’t have the knowledge”. Then, shortly after she stood on that scale 129 pounds down, with confetti dropping and her hands straight up in the air with pure joy…she took the time to meet with me for breakfast, share so much of what she learned, and she inspired me, believing that I could do the same.

So for me, this is one of those full circle moments. I am 70 pounds down since that first breakfast with Olivia and her husband, Ben, I still have a long way to go, but I am now about to spend a week with Olivia and Hannah and Carter Hays (Hannah’s trainer), along with Marci and Courtney (also contestants from the Biggest Loser…Courtney was the girl who lost 100 pounds before she could go on the ranch, and then lost even more when she got there. They were the mother/daughter team, who also owns a Dairy Queen.)

So, these are some of the “celebrities and experts” that I am so blessed to be spending the week with. It will be a week where they all share everything they have learned…from exercise to nutrition to cooking to the spiritual and mental side of what it takes to finally win the battle with weight for good. I know that this week is going to be the most amazing gift, but, yes, there is a part of me that is petrified!

As a woman, you can imagine all the things going through my mind at this point…will I be able to handle the work outs, will I be the last one if we are running or doing a challenge, will I be able to do it all, what will the other women be like who are going, what will I wear to work out in, what will I wear to hang out in, what will I wear to sleep in, what do I have to bring, do I have to bring/wear a bathing suit, do I have the right sneakers, can I last through the multiple workouts for the day?????…….and as the time gets closer, the questions continue.

Getting ready, shopping and packing for this has been a job and experience in itself. I already shared the story of getting fitted for sneakers…but, wow, I have been using them at the track and in my workouts and… what a difference! I have also gone out a few times for some jeans and shirts and clothes to hang out in. Of course, shopping continues to take longer than usual, as I am in between sizes,  I still start by taking in a load of clothes to the dressing room that are way too big, and different stores and designers run so differently in size. I have to get that out of my head at times, that just because the size is bigger in something, doesn’t mean I have gained weight back or increased in size. I am still losing and going down. I have bought larges, extra larges and even 1x in the same day, all because the cut is different.

Another amazing moment occurred at Target last week. I saw that Target now has tall jeans, and are offering 6 different fits for different body types. so I took a chance and grabbed a 14tall to try on. Wasn’t sure if it would even fit, as many times cheaper clothes run smaller, but when I tried them on, they were actually a bit roomy. I don’t know what made me go back out on the floor and grab a size down, but I actually found a 12 tall and took it into the dressing room to give it a try. When I buttoned and zipped those jeans, I just stood there and looked in the mirror, realizing that it was truly another “moment” in this journey. I checked the tag again to make sure it was true, and I just could barely believe it. Now, I know that I am not a true size 12 in everything …yet. But I can say that I fit in a pair of jeans that are a size 12. I have not been in a size 12 since I was in high school. (and a year ago I was in a size 22)

I needed this moment, because I have been stuck all summer at the 70 pound weight loss. I have really plateaued, and I’m doing everything I can to keep going. I have cried on the scale a few Saturday mornings at WW, because this is the first summer that I have stayed on a diet, exercised 5 times a week all summer long, and I truly thought I would have been another 5-10 pounds down.
About 12 weeks ago, we filled out a post card at WW to ourselves, which we had to give back to the leader, knowing that it would be mailed to us Labor Day weekend. I remember being so fired up, going into the summer, believing that I could keep going for the first summer in my entire life. Other summers, I would either take a break for the summer, or would do something extreme for the summer to start, and then give up midway, promising myself that I would start when the kids went back to school and I would “get back on a schedule and lose the weight.” This was the first summer of my life that I hung in there the entire summer.

I’m not saying that I was perfect. In fact, let me share with you something that I did that I hope I will never do again…In July, we were suppose to go away to California on our vacation, but with my mom and dad’s medical issues, I knew that I couldn’t leave. It was really hard to accept that we wouldn’t be going away on any family vacations this summer, which is something I hold onto…being able to just get away with my husband and children alone, even if it is not anywhere extravagant. It is a time to just be with one another on the same schedule, which gets harder and harder with all of their activities, jobs, etc. My brother decided to come in with his 2 children, so that we could at least together. the kids could be with their cousins, and he could help me with my parents.

My brother has been one of my biggest supporters, so he was all ready to make sure we worked out every day. He even came to my gym for a class. During the week, I told him that one of my goals was to run the Turkey trot on Thanksgiving, which is a 5 mile run, so he even got me up on the track and showed me that I could already run a mile without stopping. That was pretty amazing to find out that I was able to do that. (a week later, after he left, I ran 2 miles with my daughter, and then ran 3 miles with my husband). Still working up to the 5 miles.

In the meantime, during the week my brother was here, I made a big mistake and decided to relax, not count points or food for the week, and in our “vacation” mode, my brother made sure around 5 o’clock, cocktails were flowing. I haven’t done that in a long time, because the points and calories for alcohol have not been worth it, and of course while drinking, the chips and pretzels and dips arrive…not a smart place to put myself in. Well, although I didn’t go absolutely crazy with food and drinks, and we did exercise every day while he was here, when I got on the scale Friday night when he left, I was up 10 pounds in that one week!!! I couldn’t believe it. I thought maybe 2 or 3, but 10!…I was shocked and upset and just started to beat myself up. It took me weeks to lose 10 pounds, and here the scale was saying that I put 10 on in just one week.

I knew that I would go to ww the next morning no matter what, but I chose not to weigh in. I wasn’t going to have a 10 pound gain in one week on my card. ( I did track it on my graph, though. I have to face it. I went to ww and got right on target that day, and a friend of mine who worked for ww said, don’t worry, it is not all “real” weight. You lost it slowly and the right way, you didn’t really gain 10 pounds in one week. That was easy for her to say. but I was stuck on that number from the night before. I wouldn’t have believed it, had I not lived through this one also, but Saturday night, after getting back on track for 1 day, drinking all my water, etc. I was already down 6 pounds!   Thank God, she was right, it wasn’t all “real” weight. And i’m so thankful that I went to ww the very next day to get back on track. Years ago, I would have given up at that point for the summer, and promised myself to start after Labor Day when the kids went back to school. Not this time!

That was the good news, but the tough news has been that I have been playing around with that last 4 for a few weeks now, and it is not gone for good, yet. I have been eating so clean, perfect weighing and measuring, and the scale is stuck. I have exercised 5 days a week, and even jogged at the track a few times, and it is just not moving. I have broken down in tears a few times on the scale, even handed my weekly food diary to the leaders at ww, who looked at it and said it is really perfect, the only thing they said to try is to flip breakfast and lunch to change it up a bit, but they keep promising that the scale will catch up. A few people asked if I had measured my body lately, so that I could see that I am losing inches and my body is still changing, which was great, because I hadn’t done that since April, for the Dr. Oz finale. It was great to see the loss in inches. It was a great discovery to see that my body is still changing in inches all over.

So, the loss in inches, along with buying a size 12 pair of jeans, are my off scale victories for now, that I have to hold onto, as I am waiting for the scale to move. I also had blood work done and a saliva test to see if there is anything going on hormonally in my body.

In the meantime, although I am petrified…I am also beyond excited,with great expectation of all that I am going to learn at this retreat/bootcamp. I will be spending the week with others who have gone through all that I am going through, and I am praying that all of their wisdom and knowledge will take me to a new level in this weight loss, fitness and health journey. Holding onto the promise that…, I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.

I will write as much as I can during the week, and I will try to post it each day so that I can share all that I am learning and experiencing that week. I know, based on all that I have been through, along with how this all unfolded, in somewhat of a “full circle moment”, that this is truly a “divine appointment”, and I can’t wait to see what the Lord has in store for all of us that week. Looking forward to sharing it with all of you.

PS. Remember that Labor Day card I wrote to myself 12 weeks ago? I was so worried about getting it in the mail, as I couldn’t remember what I had written to myself, and with this plateau after the weight gain in July, i was so afraid to read it and feel that I had failed at my goal. Well, It arrived last week, and this is what I had written…

“O.K. Wend,-12 weeks until Labor Day!-Today you gained 1.8 pounds, because Dad is in rehab after his stroke, crazy week. You need a goal for summer to continue your amazing success. The summer will be crazy, but you CAN continue to do this!
1.) I will do the rowing class and the race
2.) I will work out 4x a week this summer
3.) I will be in a new number.
It’s going to be a rough summer– remember Wendy–“after me, you come first.”

I was so relieved to finally read the post card, as I had totally forgotten what I wrote. What is amazing, is that I didn’t just put..”you will lose ___pounds by Labor Day.”

Because of that, I was able to celebrate what I wrote…I not only finished the rowing class, but our boat won the entire final race!…a night I will never forget. I worked out 5x’s a week most of the summer, and although I am at a plateau, I am in a new number.
I actually kept this postcard to remind myself that I really made these goals during a very very difficult summer. It’s a nice feeling to be proud of myself, especially after getting a postcard that I thought was going to really be disappointing.

So, I am excited to continue setting wonderful goals…and going to my first retreat/bootcamp in the coming week is going to be a week filled with incredible goals to accomplish!